For Sam Hightower, 18, the path of grief was at times rocky and unclear. But with every step, and the support of the HopeWest Kids program, he’s found his way forward.
Sam was only eight years old when he lost his father to an incurable brain tumor. He doesn’t remember all the details, but he does remember feelings of sadness and confusion. Aside from his brother who is three years older than him, he didn’t know of any other kids who had lost a parent. In his words, he wanted to feel normal.
To help him and his brother cope, their mother enrolled them in grief support groups through HopeWest Kids that are held in Rio Blanco County Schools. It was there that Sam connected with other children who, like him, were learning to navigate the difficult road of grief.
“I felt comforted being around others who were experiencing the same thing as me,” said Sam.
That summer, Sam and his brother attended HopeWest Kids’ Camp Good Grief, a weekend camp designed to help kids and teens express their emotions and develop healthy coping skills through activities like art, music, and storytelling.
As Sam grew older, he channeled his grief into activities that brought him closer to his father’s memory like hiking, skiing, and golfing.
“My dad loved to spend time outdoors and he liked sharing those experiences with our family. We used to snowshoe to the yurt up Marvine Creek and now that’s a special place I like to visit,” said Sam.
Sam shares his father’s adoration for the outdoors. This summer, Sam and his family are set to hike Mount Kilimanjaro. While this is no small undertaking, Sam knows that with mental preparedness and proper planning – he can do hard things.
“Like climbing a mountain, grief too, is a journey. There are challenging moments and unknowns at every turn, but there are also moments when you stop and look around and see the beauty around you, and how far you’ve come,” said Jessica Boff, Director of Bereavement Services at HopeWest. “At HopeWest Kids we’re not here to fix kids or completely rid them of all grief. Grief is proof that love was present, and we wouldn’t want to take that away from them. We are here to equip them with the skills needed when the journey of life and grief gets tough and help them to recognize the beautiful and wonderful life they’ve created despite the uphill road.”
While Sam’s journey of healing continues, he’s had many notable accomplishments along the way. But Sam’s commitment to giving back is perhaps the most telling part of his story. He returned to the HopeWest Kids program as a volunteer “buddy,” mentoring younger children who are navigating their own grief journeys. Sam expected old feelings of grief to resurface, but while helping others who had gone through what he once did, he discovered this experience to be another chance for healing.
“Going back to HopeWest Kids as a volunteer I realized I can’t really get rid of my grief. It’s just something I’ll have to continually learn to live with,” he said. “Accepting that has been the most powerful thing for me. I no longer live in the shadow of my grief.”
Sam graduated as the valedictorian of Meeker High School’s Class of 2025. Sam was actively involved in several school clubs, set a new school record in pole vaulting, managed the girls’ volleyball team, and served as Student Council President. This fall, he plans to pursue a degree in Aerospace Engineering at Boston University.
“It’s been really eye opening. I know what I want to make my life about and what I value.” he said. “I want to give back and help others, just like those who helped me.”
Most children, more than three quarters, participating in the HopeWest Kids program have suffered a non-hospice death of a loved on. And, of that number, nearly 41% are grieving the loss of a parent or sibling.
These statistics are on the rise, which means there is still more work to be done. As a program reliant on philathropy, through grants, community partnerships and supporters like you, we can continue to make a difference in the lives of children.
“Like climbing a mountain, grief too, is a journey. There are challenging moments and unknowns at every turn, but there are also moments when you stop and look around and see the beauty around you, and how far you’ve come.”
Jessica Boff, HopeWest director of Bereavement
